I'm back home, after spending three weeks away because my dear Mama passed away. My heart is broken, yet I know she is no longer in pain, doesn't have diabetes anymore, and she knew I loved her so much. Our last conversation was just a day before she collapsed and two days before she passed. I told her how much I loved her... and she told me the same.... I'll always be grateful for that last talk on the phone.

My hubby and I drove for 11 hours to get to the hospital 24 hrs before Mama went to be with the Lord. He dropped everything, including a very important work assignment, to get me 'home'. He was my rock. We've been married over 32 years, and he still surprises me. He took me home, stayed as long as he needed to be with me, then drove back to where we live now, and got the work assignment done, then drove back to 'home'. No complaining about all the trips. He did what I needed him to do... I am so thankful. It's hard to put into words just how endearing his actions are and will forever be to me.

Life is full of changes, people come into our lives and leave. I believe we learn lessons from each and every one. However, there is no one like someone who has known you since childhood, knows all your little secrets that no one else (including the hubby) has any idea about, and is your best friend. My best friend came to comfort and be with me when she found out about my Mom. She left a couple days earlier than expected to go to a family reunion, so she could 'be there' for me... whatever I needed. God truly blessed me with her friendship. Although, she is more than friend..... she's my sister by heart. Where ever she is, I'll 'be there' for her, when she needs my shoulder and my hand to hold hers.

My Mama was stubborn, opinionated, loving, loyal and cared for those who were less fortunate than her. Her earlier life was filled with pain and alot of heartache. She grew up in foster homes, where people didn't really care about her. When she got married and  had kids, she didn't know how to cope. My sisters, brother and I had some hard times growing up. Mom wasn't emotionally ready to take care of 5 kids and a harsh husband. One of my siblings is unforgiving of those times, and how negative Mom could be,  but I forgave her a long time ago. She did the best she could, with what life she was given and I'm proud to have been her first child. I'll always love her and know she loved me.

I am so grateful for the time I spent with my sisters, after Mom left us. We had some great bonding moments. One of the first things we said, after Mom passed, was that we are now orphans. Isn't that strange? It doesn't matter how old you are, when you last parent dies, you are an orphan. It was good to know that we weren't the only people to think that,,,, my neighbor said she and her siblings thought the same thing.

It was also good to see my brother and have some time with him. Hadn't seen him in years. He looks and talks so much like our Dad... and he has Dad's hands..... funny what we notice about eachother.  My sisters and I talked about how much we looked like Mom and each other, too.

PICTURES!!! Oh how my Mom had pictures!!!! Some I hadn't seen in many many years. They brought back wonderful memories of vacations and silly things we kids did when we were growing up. We cried, laughed, joked, then cried and laughed again. Sharing all this with them made the pain ease some.... lifted our hurting hearts. There was no fighting, accusations, or hurtful talk..like I have seen in other families. I am sure we all are grateful for that!! I'm proud of us, too. Mom would be too.

Well, now that I wrote a book... there is still so much in my heart, but will close for now. If anyone reads this, leave a comment. It would be so nice to read how you, Dear Reader, have coped with the loss of your parent/s.